The end of an era

The time has come to say goodbye. I can’t believe my year in Nepal has come to an end and that the adventure is over. I’m writing this from the guesthouse where I’m staying – the same place I stayed in when I arrived last November. I feel like a completely different person to the one who cried in her room for  the first week!  I’m having difficultly in reflecting on my experience as it feels a little overwhelming when I think of everything I’ve done, the places I’ve been, how many kind and interesting people I’ve met,  and just how much I have learned, about myself, other people and the country. I’m not sure I can really appreciate the full extent of this experience and the impact it has had on me right now – I suspect that will come weeks or months after returning home, but for now there are a handful of moments from the year which I remember as particular highlights:

The village stay. Definitely the biggest challenge of the year but the sense of achievement I had when sitting on the roof of Pacific Guesthouse after arriving back in Kathmandu, having had a first shower in 7 days and enjoying a beer in the sunshine with my fellow volunteers is one I will never forget.

Going to Chitwan for the weekend with Jamuna, Sanjita, Babu, Rupa and Carina

Hiking up Champadevi, seeing that amazing view and meeting Sam and Raj

Spending a week in Xian with Nick.

Hitchhiking in the back of a cattle truck in Dhulikhel with the youth exchange group

Trekking with the girls and watching the sunrise over the mountains on Poon Hill

Getting tikka from Madan’s family in Jhapa

My penultimate day in Kathmandu, going for lunch with Pragati, Astha, Sudha and Anisha followed by a trip to the fun park

While I’m going to miss so many things about life here, there are of course things I’m pretty sure I won’t miss – the spitting, the rubbish, the traffic, the staring and the rats. After a year I still didn’t get used to these things, but I now realise this is ok – it just makes going home all the more exciting as I feel that is where I belong.  I will however sorely miss the sunshine, the food, the mountains, the chaos, the colours, the smells, the buses, the temples, and of course the people.

The people are what make any place what it is, and Nepalis truly make Nepal a wonderful country. Never before have I experienced such kindness, hospitality and generosity. I’ve made some friends for life, and not just Nepalis, but the other volunteers I’ve met from America, The Philippines, Africa, and the UK. Thank you to you all for having such an impact on my time here, I will never forget you.

This has been the hardest, most challenging, and at times frustrating thing I’ve ever done. There were times when I felt so painfully lonely and all I wanted to do was come home. But it’s also been the best year of my life and the fact that it’s been so hard only makes it feel more of an achievement. For the first time in my life I feel really proud of myself. Proud that I did this on my own, proud that I grasped every opportunity and proud that I can see how the experience has changed me for the better.  And so I leave with no regrets. Only amazing memories, new friends, about two thousand photos and a shit load of luggage!

Thank you to you all for reading my blog and for your kind words and encouragement. I hope you have enjoyed reading my tales as much as I have writing them. And who knows, perhaps in a few years time there will be another adventure to write about…

Eastern adventures – Dashain in Jhapa

I’ve just returned back to Kathamandu after what feels like a very long time away. I have been in Jhapa (in the Eastern terai of Nepal, near the Indian border), celebrating Dashain with Madan and his family in his village. It took us 17 hours to get there on the bus, and 15 hours to get back. I’ve had about two hours sleep and have so much to do before I leave on Sunday morning, but my mind is whirling with everything I have seen and experienced since last Tuesday.

Dashain is the biggest festival in Nepal and is the equivalent of our Christmas. It celebrates Durga (one of the Hindu gods) and lasts for around 15 days. As well as various puja, the main event is tikka, where family get together to bless their younger relatives by putting red power mixed with rice and yoghurt on their foreheads.

I wasn’t really sure what to expect from Jhapa as I had never visited the terai before, but it is absolutely beautiful. Although the people there live simply and make their living from agriculture, the land is rich with resources and people are generally well educated and enjoy secure livelihoods. The actual area is so green and almost tropical and everywhere you can see coconut and banana trees, paddy fields, fields of sugar cane and various other things. Because of this relative affluence there are far fewer INGOs than in the West and therefore very few foreigners. I spent the week very much feeling like the ‘only white in the village’ and was met by curious, but friendly, stares almost everywhere I went.

After arriving on Wednesday, having a quick nap, shower and the first of many plates of dal bhaat, we headed off into Birtamod market, the central hub of Jhapa, to meet a couple of Madan’s old school friends.

On Thursday we went for a walk before breakfast during which we stopped off at various family members houses, as well as happening upon a neighbour who was performing a chicken sacrificial! Narendra was waiting for us when we got back, as we had arranged to visit Ilam together. After four hours, we arrived in Ilam, another stunningly beautiful place, best known for its tea plantations, but also for chillies and milk based products.  After a wander around we headed back to our hotel for tungba and dinner. We spent Friday wandering around a town called Phikkle and the tea plantations and headed back to Jhapa in the afternoon.

Saturday was a pretty full on day. I got up at 5am to watch Madan’s mum milk their enormous buffalo – I really wanted to have a go but I didn’t want to interrupt her busy schedule, plus it looked like seriously hard work! As I was enjoying my breakfast (tea and a plate of biscuits – the staple of any nutritious meal!) I was suddenly summoned over to a neighbours house where they were preparing to do away with one of their goats. I was given a front row seat and permission to snap away while they blessed the goat, and arranged the chopping block. Gulp. They invited Madan to do the deed and he took the head of with one impressive swoop. As the blood gushed out I have to admit I came over a little queasy, but it was fascinating – the kind of thing you really don’t want to see it but you sort of want to as well! But, there was no time to watch the rest, as I was whisked off by Madan’s friend Deepak to visit the Durga temple, and then on to see Suraj, another friend, at his home.

We then returned to Madan’s with Deepak and three other guys and started preparing our own goat sacrificial. This time I got to see the whole process and even helped take the fur off the headless carcass. It was pretty disgusting but also really interesting watching the boys at work, and a couple of hours later we were all sitting around enjoying freshly cooked goats skin, blood, ear, fat, and organs. You name it, I have eaten it, and it was all delicious!

In the afternoon we visited a park with a big lake in the middle where we hired pedallos and a small zoo housing some rather sorry looking animals.

Sunday was the main day of Dashain as it is the day when families put tikka on their younger relatives. After a lot of hanging around with the family (about 35 people of various ages and relations) at Madan’s grandfathers house, the proceedings began. Firstly we did puja for the Hindu gods Durga, and then Shiva, and then it was time for tikka. I was pretty nervous when it came to my turn as I was terrified of doing something wrong and offending everyone, but it was fine. As I sat down in front of Madan’s grandfather, he started the blessing and a sea of hands rushed in to put tikka on my forehead and money in my hands. I then showed my respect by bowing my head to their feet and doing Namaste. It was a crazy, amazing experience. I’m so lucky to have been welcomed into Madan’s family and to have even had the opportunity to be there at all.

On Monday Madan borrowed a friend’s bike and we drove to our colleague Narendra’s wife’s family home, about an hour away. We were welcomed into Rita’s family home, given food and drinks and were we ushered into the adjacent room for tikka. Rita’s father put tikka on me, Narendra and Madan, and gave us presents. I really wasn’t expecting this and felt a bit awkward by their generosity and my lack of return offering. We then sat back in the main room where I managed to chat to Rita’s mum and dad by bashing out a bit of Nepali. Everyone I have met in Jhapa has been lovely, but this family in particular were so sweet, and although I found the afternoon a little stressful due to my inability to communicate effectively, it was great meet them and spend time with Rita.

In the evening I got yet another present, this time from Madan’s mum and sister, in the form of a beautiful kurta (a nepali top). I am just overwhelmed by their kindness and generosity. They cooked me food every day, wouldn’t let me help at all, and even insisted on washing some of my clothes for me. I wish I could have expressed my appreciation better than I did.

It’s been an amazing week. Its been hard work, due to my lack of Nepali and life here is so very different to what I’m used to, but I am so glad I went and so grateful to Madan for looking after me so well and for inviting me to spend such an important week with him and his family. At times during this year I have wished that I could have led a more ‘expat life’ i.e., had more money to go out more, to have had a nicer apartment etc, but I now realise that what I’ve been exposed to as a volunteer is a lot more real and I wouldn’t change any of my experiences for the world.

 

A Nepali wedding

I had resigned to the fact that I would be leaving Nepal without having been to a wedding, so when Jamuna (an old colleague) invited me to her wedding, I was gutted that it was when the girls were here. But then Babu, another colleague, suggested I just bring them along, so we all jumped at the chance!

As well as wanting to see my friend get married, especially as she had previously told me about her boyfriend so I knew it was a love marriage as opposed to an arranged one, I was really excited about getting dressed up in a sari. I don’t usually enjoy getting dressed up in posh dresses and would rather live in jeans and flip flops, but there seems to be something special about wearing a sari. Maybe it’s just the novelty factor, I’m not sure, but I’ve definitely never worn anything so spangly or beautiful before.

My friend Pragati came over for breakfast to meet the girls and help us get ready. I didn’t realise putting on a sari was so complicated! The girls looked amazing, and we all felt great.

Anna needed to pick up some jeans from the tailors in Thamel and we had to find a wedding present for Jamuna, so after lots of photos outside the guesthouse, we headed off for a strut about town! Nepalis are generally really open with their opinions and as well as telling me when they think I look nice, I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been called fat, with no malice intended. I knew we would get stared at a lot but I wasn’t expecting every single person we passed to say something! If you ever need a confidence boost, all you need to do is walk through the streets of Thamel in a sari, and you’ll end up feeling great!

We arrived at the temple to more comments, smiles and stares and were met by a guy who whisked us away to give us tikka . It was the usual red blob, but this time with rice, followed by a small silver spot and a yellow ‘U’ shape underneath, plus he wound some red and yellow cotton around our right wrist. I’m not sure of the significance of this but it set our outfits off a treat!

Jamuna arrived with Sanjita an hour and a half late (Nepali time at its best!) but looked absolutely amazing. She was wearing a red sari, complete with more bling than I’ve ever seen on one tiny person, a red veil, and an array of other spangle and glitz.

The ceremony took place in the corner of the main temple. To my surprise the man performing the ceremony was the guy who had put tikka on us, and who had spent the last hour and a half talking to me, declaring his love for me – slightly awkward!

The ceremony was a very casual, but very Nepali affair, with people pushing past to get through the crowd, beggars asking for money, and guests just chatting amongst themselves throughout the proceedings. Once they had been married, we all went to a restaurant for some food, and then it was time for the new couple to head to Pokhara to spend Dashain (a major festival) with the groom’s family.

Although this wedding was very informal and modern by Nepali standards, I am so happy that I got a chance to see some of the traditions, and that my friends could also experience this. Being accepted as part of the wedding party by the other guests, despite never meeting them before, and all of the kind comments from strangers was so touching and really reflects how welcoming and generous Nepalis are.

Mountain views – trekking around the Annapurnas

We set off from Kathmandu on Thursday morning with our two guides who we met at the Alternative Nepal office. Phasang (who we nick named Fu Fu as we just couldn’t remember his name for the first two days) was our main guide, and Bhuwan (nicknamed Beaver – again for our rubbish ability to remember names!) was the trainee guide. The journey down to Pokhara was pretty painless despite being a rather sweaty 8 hours, and we had a nice evening out in Lakeside that night.

At 6:30 on Friday morning we set off for the bus park and jumped on what felt like the longest and coldest bus journey ever, to our starting point, Nayapul.  After walking for around 5 hours, with a break for breakfast and rather bizarrely lunch an hour and a half later, we reached our final destination for the day by around 2pm. I  was feeling a bit unsatisfied by the short walk but when we asked Phasang if this was going to be the routine every day, he assured us he was just warming us up and breaking us in gently!  We settled in a tea house for the evening in a place called Tikhedhunga (alt 1540m ascent 720m). I’m not sure what I was expecting, but the tea house  by far exceeded these expectations and I couldn’t believe it when I had a hot shower, my first in months!

After guzzling several cups of amazing nepali chiyaa, and an enormous plate of dal bhaat, we whiled away the evening by chatting with Fu Fu and Beaver and some other trekkers. Bed time was 9pm as we were told to be ready by 6:30am the next morning and ready to climb a big hill!

As promised, the hill was pretty challenging but it felt good to conquer the first of what would be many many massive hills. Our efforts were rewarded by our first glimpse of the mountains, and we had breakfast at the top of the hill overlooking an amazing view in the sunshine.

Around 6 hours later we arrived at Ghorepani (alt 2860m ascent 1320m), after many more hill climbs. This tea house had a fire which was such a blessing as the higher altitude had a noticeable effect on the temperature – it was freezing!

The next morning we had to get up at 3:45am in order to climb Poon Hill alt 3210m), the highest point of our trek, for the sunrise. Although the climb only took us around 30 minutes, it was pretty challenging due to the darkness, and I felt so much more out of breath due to the altitude. The stars on the way up were amazing, and although dark, we could already see the outline of the mountains. We were one of the first groups to reach the top and eagerly awaited sunrise with a mug of deliciously sweet coffee.

As the sun started rising the mountains became clearer and clearer, and more beautiful. Neither my words, nor my photos can do the view justice. Being there, seeing such an amazing sight with the girls, felt quite special and I think it is a sight I will never forget. The only downside to the whole experience was the fact that there were about 100 other people fighting for the same view and getting good shots without random people in was quite a challenge!

After a 30 minute descent, we had a quick breakfast at the tea house and set off again for a full day of walking. Although yesterday was a bit more challenging than the first day, we were all still keen to really push ourselves and so persuaded Phasang to change the route to give us a few extra hours walking. Famous last words. Instead of finishing at Tadopani, we walked all the way to Ghandruk, and effectively ended up doing two days of walking in one!

We were all so glad to reach the tea house by 4pm and all immediately whipped off our walking boots to survey the damage. After a good stretch and another amazing shower everyone felt a lot better. Despite feeling exhausted we were satisfied with the challenge, especially as we had had such a laugh together all day. Giggling while trying to climb a massive hill certainly doesn’t help the lungs but it is a lot of fun! After more tea and dal bhaat, we sat around inside the restaurant chatting to Phasang and Bhuwan, and even shared some raksi (local millet wine) with Bhuwan, which was pretty funny when he started slurring a little!

After having a leisurely breakfast outside the next morning with an amazing view of the mountains in the background, we set off around 9am for our last full day of walking. As we walked downhill for an hour, we were all a bit surprised to then be faced with another huge hill to climb. Many more hills and 7 hours of walking later, we reached Pothana where we were to spend our last night. On first reflection, this tea house appeared a little ropey and we were not impressed when there was no hot water for showers – I had got used to the luxury by this point! The evening was by far the best evening however, as we were entertained by the little boy who lives there, who pulled out the most incredible dance moves ever! We all got stuck in, including Bhuwan who was just hilarious.

Our last day was very easy, just a couple of hours but by this point we were all pretty tired, including Phasang and Bhuwan who had been carting around all of our stuff on their backs! We got a taxi back to Pokhara which was yet another hilarious moment. After all 6 of us had piled in (me draped across the girls in the back and FuFu and Beaver sharing the front seat!), our driver sped away in his rude boy Suzuki blaring out the tunes, including DISCO and Shaggy, which we all had a good old sing along to! Back at the Guesthouse, we had beers in the sun and reflected on what was an amazing 5 days.

Overall it has been one of the best weeks of my year in Nepal. I’ve laughed more this past week than I have all year and spending so much time with the girls giggling over silly things, chatting and sharing the mountains views and up hill challenges has just been so much fun. On one hand, the scenery that I’ve seen, and the local people ive met along the way makes me want to stay here so much, but on the other hand, being with my best friends has reminded me how good it feels to be with people that I love, and I now cant wait to come home to be with them more.